Thursday, August 20, 2009
{ 9:55 PM }
it feels like riding a wild horse in the middle of a raging hurricane.
help...?
feeling very very confused right now.
still having trouble sinking into my new role.
having troubles. having doubts. priorities are a blur right now.
maybe i need some time...? some time to think, some time to relax,
some time to reaffirm who i am.
many things can change in the blink of an eye,
and the past week has been that specific blink of the eye.
suddenly i feel so on the edge, like every small action that i make,
that every wrong step that i take will end up in disaster,
end up with my falling of the cliff, end up with me being squashed like some tiny ant,
end up with me forgetting what's the most important thing in this world.
2 years ago as i looked into the mirror, i saw a chubby face with a cheerful smile.
1 year ago, i saw a slimmed and smiling one, but it was mine nonetheless.
and this year, as i looked into the mirror,
i hardly recognize myself anymore. in front of me was a face filled with worries,
filled with confusion, unsure of where to go and what to do.
my mind feels like a worn out soccer ball that has been thrown in the mud and drag through the desert floor until it has totally lost its shape and design, totally lost its details and purpose.
argh! i guess i just need time... but time waits for no man.
as i look, the world is slowly losing its colours.
its no longer what it was, fun and lively. vibrant and colorful.
i guess i will just let it roll, and see where everything goes.
maths test is tmr. good luck to all!
